Resolutions 2011

I make the same resolution every year...every year since I turned 50 (eons ago).  That was the year the belly pooch appeared and stubbornly refused to leave.  A few years later the thunder thighs arrived and took up residence right around the corner from the bulbous butt.  Each new year brings new determinism to evict these nasty tenants. My 60th birthday was celebrated with a mother/daughter cruise to the Bahamas and an amazing 140 pound woman went in my place.  Another cruise is being planned with a second daughter and MicroWorld has become all too involved.  Everyone has become my weight-loss guru.  The goal is 30 pounds in 3 months.  Did I mention in an earlier blog that the average age of MicroWorld's residents is 89?  Are you people suffering DEMENTIA?!!!  Hey, I am probably going on this cruise as a matronly matron.  In your mid 60's you have to expect that. But no one is letting me off the hook.  So here I go again with Resolution 2011......lose weight...massive amounts, and be thin and beautiful.  Ah, dreams....what would we do without 'em.   Ok, I will try, and I promise to report my progress.  I have even done the math.  At the unrealistic rate of 2 pounds per week, in 12 weeks I would theoretically lose 24 pounds.  Close, but still no cigar.  But MicroWorld has their new poster child and they wagged disapproving fingers at me as I carried a plate laden with turkey and dressing, swimming in gravy.  "It's for my husband, I swear!" , I repeated loudly.  Since most of them suffer severe hearing loss, I doubt they heard me.  Hey guys, I'm making a new resolution for 2011..to spend my next birthday in Las Vegas with my two daughters and have the time of our lives with or without extra baggage. Can I get an amen! Thank you.